Toy Story 3 Breakdown (literally)

No, WE are eternally grateful.

(SPOILER FREE!) Being the hardworking young Americans we both are, we went to a weekday morning showing of Toy Story 3 (in glorious 2-D!) equipped with enough doughnuts and mimosas to crack open the hard shells of cynicism and bitterness we typically don and enough Kleenex to dry up the resultant tears. Most are calling this the best movie of the summer. Many are calling it the best movie of the year. Some are now even calling the entire saga the best motion picture trilogy of all time. So what’d we think of the finale of one of the most influential and memorable film series of our lifetimes?

… you’ll need to give us a moment.

The Power of Three

And I’m not talking Charmed.

I’m sure you’ve all heard of the superstition that bad things happen in threes. Think about movie trilogies like Austin Powers, Barbershop, or Spiderman. Pretty terrible, right? Consider musical acts Wild Orchid, Cleopatra (comin’ attcha), The Jonas Brothers, and Wilson Philips. Stop happening! Two out of three of those gifts from the wise men sucked! And don’t kid yourself that it’s any kind of coincidence that there are three branches of government.

Sure there are exceptions, and you don’t need to fill our comments box with your “Hewey, Dewey and Louie” nonsense. I’ll just say Star Wars Episdoes 1, 2 & 3 and leave it at that. Hate to play that trump card but mama’s got to do it.

Little known fact: Blanche Devereaux is the "she" in every That's What She Said joke.

Noting this rich history of terribleness you can imagine my horror when I heard the news that Gary Coleman and Dennis Hopper bit it last week. I knew it was only a matter of time before we heard about what famous person that we’d forgotten about suddenly kicked the bucket. Well, we finally got our third corpse (you’re off the hook this time, Lindsey Lohan) but unfortuantely it was Rue McClanahan, of Blanche from Golden Girls fame, who passed away this morning. While I am relieved that it isn’t Betty White, yeah I said it, I’m still sad to hear this news. First Bea and now this? It’s almost too much to bear. Damn you, power of three! You’ve bested us yet again.

(Although if anything could turn this superstition around, perhaps it’s this. Fingers crossed!)